A Perspective on Losing

The following is a piece I wrote to the girls and parents of my U15 Girls Gaelic Football team the morning after a bitter defeat in a semi final the previous day. I wanted to give them a winning perspective on losing. It's all about your response to events and circumstances.





It’s the morning after the day before and thoughts turn to what might have been, if only this or that had happened then …… what might have been. But what might have been is of limited value, what was and what can be is where our focus should settle. 
 
Every single successful team in the world ever, knows what it’s like to lose. Every single successful person in the world ever, knows what it’s like to fail. Because you can’t have success without failure or taste victory without defeat. We only need to look to our own Dublin Ladies footballers who were defeated in the 2014, 2015 and 2016 All Ireland Finals before going on to win the next four in a row. 
 
What was and is …. 

• is that we have moments of sublime passing football sweeping from back to front and glorious clinical finishes. 
• is that we have moments of dogged defending, fighting tooth and nail to get our ball back and resume our advances up the pitch. 
• is that we have moments of diehard determination and lung busting runs to close out our competitors game. 
• is that we are playing at the highest level, in the most competitive county and we are there, we are competitive and on our day are capable of victory. We have had “our days” against all of our competitors. 

 
However, as we have seen yesterday, at our level, the margins are fine. It’s that extra run, block, shot, catch, interception that make up these moments of difference. That thin line between glorious victory or bitter defeat. 
 
I am in awe of your daughters on those bitterly cold nights on the training pitch, grinding out those drills and after a long day at school. They are committed and they are bonded, as indeed we are as parents on the sidelines. We know how it feels to drive home after a great win or narrow defeat. 
 
The best is yet to come. It’s in our hands, our collective commitment (girls, parents and coaches). It takes a village to raise a team 😀. 
 
It’s a special thing to be part of a team, to be part of something bigger. Your girls, our girls have done us proud. We stand of the sidelines never really knowing what it’s like to be on the stage. It’s always easier from our point of view. 
 
The personal growth is in the losing as well as the winning. From my point of view, this is about broader personal development, not simply goals or points. Life, by its very nature, will give you a kick in the teeth every now and again and it’s in the resilience, the personal responsibility and the rising again that we all get through it. 
COME ON THE GIRLS!!

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